I grew up poor, multiethnic, female and lived in City
Heights (and under-developed, “ghetto” neighborhood in San Diego, CA). For my
younger years, I went to inner-city public schools where all of the minority
teachers taught under a white principal and extra curricular programs were
sparse. But still, we were a happy group of minority youngsters…always happy
for the chance of a field trip and class party. The teachers I had in
elementary were exceptional and knew how to interact with a bunch of inner city
kids. For middle and high school my parents had me on a waiting list that
secured my admittance into a predominantly white middle and high school, where
the teachers were almost all white and favoritism was prevalent in all
classrooms. In these schools, if you weren't white or Asian, you would just be
swept under the rug and pushed along.
My mom, me, my dad, and my little brother. |
Thankfully, I had supportive and hard-working parents who
believed the best way for their children to get out of the “cycle” would be to
have them work hard and take advantage of opportunities. My mother was born and
raised in Mexico, coming to this side to attend middle and high school
(education in Mexico isn't free, and with six children and a meager income, my
grandparents couldn't afford to send all of their children to school). She knew
what a hungry belly felt like and how often there wasn't any money.
Additionally, she and her siblings had the burden of taking care of their
younger brothers and sisters while their parents worked around the clock to
earn a living. While my mom obtained her high school diploma and became a
nationalized citizen, she never went to college and has had to work her way up
from jobs. My dad has a similar story. He was born and raised in New York City
and, with the help of his step dad, learned to love the outdoors. When his step
dad moved to San Diego, my dad went along for the ride, and he has never looked
back. He was also poor and my step grandfather was stingy. My dad worked
around-the-clock at a McDonald’s in high school to pay for food and living
expenses. He joined the high school’s JROTC where he met my mother. They
married soon after high school and he joined the Army.
Me and my little sister. |
Even now, with my parents working modest jobs, we are still
considered the “working poor”. They live in a 2 bedroom/1 bathroom house, they
pay more taxes than they should, and they somehow still manage to save enough
money to send my little brother to a Catholic school and help out family
members in tough times.
Of course, I am inspired by my parents.
From my parents I have learned to work hard and to fight
against what traditional statistics would have “planned” for me. Yes, I grew up
in neighborhoods where crime was common, the were bars on windows and where
many opportunities existed to make bad decisions. But, I also realized how much
I loved my neighborhood. It made me a thicker skin, and it gave me a taste of
life. With our huge population of
Hispanics, Somalians, Vietnamese, Ethiopians, Indians and other immigrants
there were always authentic and cheap restaurants to try and cultural
celebrations to be a part of.
Teaching a group of summer camp girls to surf. |
My parents instilled a strict set of values into us.
Thankfully, it worked wonderfully. I never became the pregnant fifteen-year-old
at school. I never joined a gang or had the desire to. I have never stolen or
committed crimes. I worked hard in school, and wanted more out of life. Some
teachers and adults saw my potential and encouraged me to step out of the stereotype. In 8th grade I was the only Mexican student to travel to
the East Coast on a week-long field trip exploring our country’s roots. A
scholarship paid for the trip, and I won awards for my work during the trip. In
high school, I worked liked a dog to raise money in order to go on trips to
Germany and Australia. In 2010, I saved money and went to live and work in
Italy. I was at every event I could possibly manage to be at in San Diego that
involved cultural enrichment and the chance to make friends with other People
of Color.
A group of inner-city high school girls (except me, I'm on the right in pink) that we took to a conference. |
I am also inspired by people like me. I am here because I
want to pursue a career that allows me to be of service and inspiration to
other inner city youth with similar backgrounds. Aside from SeaWorld, Jamba
Juice and the two jobs I work know, all of my others jobs have been working
with children and youth from low-income schools. I have taught them to dream,
to be outspoken and to question everything. Many of those students still keep
in contact and it’s great to see them grow and create bigger dreams. Working
with my mom, we have been able to save our own money to take some of these
youth to restaurants, events, workshops and retreats they would have never
otherwise been able to attend because of absent parents (who work all the time)
and financial burden.
Taking girls to a Ren Faire (I'm in the middle) |
Working with our family members, we have been able to
give prom dresses to girls who couldn't afford them and mini-scholarships to
guys who wanted to date their dates out to dinner. I remember having the house
full of high school girls, music playing in the background, while my mom,
sister and I worked to get hair and make up done. Sure, it’s hard and sometimes
was frustrating. But, I couldn't shake the feeling that all of these little
moments matter. When you are poor, when your parents are gone and when you are
forced to sacrifice your youth to act as a stand-in parent for your younger
siblings, every little thing matters. Many of these high-schoolers are already
in college, all dependent on scholarships and any income they work for.
Working with Boy Scouts in the Anza-Borrego Desert. |
And then, there is my brother. My sneaky, quirky, awesome,
and nearly twelve little brother.
Our cousin Israel and my little brother Sean (on right) |
Sean, my darling little brother is the light of my life. I
love all of my family and friends, but my little brother has his own special
place in my heart.
He is a normal kid who loves Star Wars, drawing, building
Lego models of Star Wars ships, and he’s an active soccer player and Boy Scout.
Luckily, and thankfully, he hasn't had to grow up in some of the difficult
conditions my sister and I experienced. He loves international foods, likes to
travel (the little sucker has already been to Spain, Morocco and Hawaii!!), and
to geek out on video games. He also has a heart of gold and loves to take care
of animals and be charitable to those less fortunate (when our family goes to
Mexico to cook food and donate clothes and items, Sean always makes sure to
pick out toys, shoes and clothes to give to the children).
Sean is my greatest inspiration because I never want to have
him suffer or to know hardship. My parents have done a good job with him, but
with working a lot and getting older, their energy isn't what it used to be.
When I used to live in San Diego, before moving to Prescott, I would make it a
point to do things with my brother on the weekends or whenever I had time and a
little extra money. We’d go on hikes, or play in the park. I’d take him to
lunch (usually it was sushi) just so we could stuff our faces with green tea
ice cream, and loved to hear what he had to say on certain matters (he’s very
opinionated). We would spend afternoons just drawing or playing silly games. On
his birthdays, I would dress up as something relating to his party theme (I
have been a pirate twice, a soldier three times, spiderwoman, and Padme
Amidala). We often baked and cooked together (he was eager to learn) and he was
never shy about experimenting in the kitchen. When I was involved in Scouts (as
a Venture Crew member) and brought back pictures and stories, he wanted to join
(and did). When I worked at summer
camps, I got a discount for him to attend, and he was there. When I traveled,
he warned me against doing certain things (“Angelica, when you get to
Australia, don’t go in the water, the sharks are very mean) and to remind me to
bring him back something (coins, puzzles, and “artifacts”).
I know that he’s doing great (I FaceTime him on my iPhone
often), because he tells me often what he’s doing and interested in. Always,
towards the end of the conversation he asks “Angelica, when are you coming
home?”. It’s hard to answer, because I've only been home twice in the last two
years. “As soon as I can, baby”. He’s gotten a little more “grown-up” each time
I talk to him, but, at the end of our conversations I ask him “Sean, how much
do I love you”, and he always replies “From here to the moon, plus infinity,
and back”. And when he says “I love you and miss you, sister”, I know our
conversation is done and we’ll both go back to our lives until the next phone
call.
I want the best for my little brother. Period. And that’s
mostly why I am here. I want to give children like him, like us and like my
parents a fighting chance. When I graduate in May, I want to be able to have
made my parents, brother, family and friends proud. To say “Yes! I did it!”. I
got my college degree while working two jobs and taking out student loans, in a
state that continuously passes laws to oppress my people and gender. I want to
be the teacher that makes it in an inner city schools because I relate to the
students and have real opportunities to offer them. Yes, it will be hard, but
it will be worth it.
A final word of advice to all the people out there with a
similar story: NEVER settle for anything less than what you deserve. If you
want to travel, work hard and make it happen. If you want to go to college,
believe you will, work hard, and make it happen. Never let anyone or anything
else define or confine you! Go out into the world, be brave and do great
things. Be more than the cycle you are stuck in or the statistics of your
neighborhood.
Angelica R. Brady 2.27.2013
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